so yes, i have been abandoning this blog a bit.

been thinking about it for a while, and decided that i should take this blog in another direction.

i want to give it a bit more depth, more questions to ponder upon. Less of the just-a-bit-of-scratch-on-the-surface happiness, rather focusing more on the inner-soul happiness.

when it comes to the questions of factors that are stopping me from reaching out to my dreams, i hesitate to find out the answers even more. Responsibility kicks into action, and i tell myself “hey, dont be such a selfish girl!”…on the other hand, i go “you’re a fool to let go”. so, can you see the dilemma?

anyhow, i’m a very lucky girl to have found happiness in other parts of my life…including food and family. my almost daily dose of coffee helps put a smile on my face. oh, and that pile of books beside my bed too!

i spent the last couple of months thinking about the directions in my life. i came to the conclusion that i’ve lost that self-confidence to fight for my dreams, of which i had since primary school! and why so? two main factors. 1. weight 2. uni

i know factor 1 might sound like rubbish to some people, but sometimes…you just have to agree with me that physical looks do help a teeny bit with self confidence. i mean, i’ve seen many people who are very comfortable with their weight and looks. i guess i’m just not one of them. i put on a total of nearly 15-20kg within 4 years thanks to those binge-when-stressed times. o__________0 mind-blowing, i know!

anyway, i started my gym regime in december ‘09 until feb ‘10 and lost a total of 5kg. i did put some weight back on (thanks to chinese new year) but now i’m back to gym-ing! so my resolution (i missed new years for this, but never too late! ) this year, will be to lose another 6kg. to the ‘healthy’ weight for my height haha. wish me luck people!

and for factor number 2, i guess those people who are in uni would understand my position. when you’re in a crowd of 30,000 students….you just stand out no more. it’s not such a bad thing, to not be in the limelight for once. helps you stay humble and all. so yeah, i’m going to look at it in a more positive way!

pray for me, people. and help me find my self-confidence back!

p/s my first bottle of Jacob’s Creek Cabernet Sauvignon (Vintage 2006) was great, why wasn’t the second bottle as great?!

i’ve been a good girl studying (and drama-ing) the past week. but well before the drama (pun intended), i cooked something which reminds me of my childhood. my dad calls it cook-a-wing up till this very day but the real name for it is coq au vin. tell me, is it really that similar? cook-a-wing vs coq au vin. it’s so not! for starters, i don’t use chicken wings for it, i go for thighs. preferably skinless (for health reasons they say *looks at mum and dad*). just preferably. so it’s not a must right? i love my glistening fats and skins and all so who cares? *stiffled laugh

briefly pan-fry the chicken thighs to get that beautiful golden brown crispy skin! crispy skin, i lust.

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see what i mean?

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add some good-old-vegetables. just to get the fats balanced out, haha.

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no greens this time around. greens will turn yellowish-orange after cooking anyway.

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then, my favourite part of the dish. time to choose a good wine! red one of course. i’ve never been really associated with whites (except for that bottle i received for my birthday sorry vanessa!) this time, i went for a vintage 2006 shiraz cabernet from jacob’s creek. three cheers for our south australian friends! a very comforting wine  i should say, no heavy flavours and it’s not dry thank you Jesus.

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pour the whole bottle in if you like! XD

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and then you cook and stir and boil a little further until you get the flavours out. by now, your whole kitchen should be smelling like…..coq au vin. what else if not, kfc?

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those are not eggs! my dad said they look like eggs instead of onions. damn fail.

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never ever forget to reduce the sauce to get that rich and thick consistency.

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dirty red, i like.

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serve it up hot with a good wine (if you’re an alcoholic like me) and it will be just like, fifteen melbourne. trust me, self-denial works all the time. oh oh, maybe listen to some sexy jazz music too to jazz it all up!

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guess what?

i’m still very much ‘on-the-way’ of learning the reds, but i’m already as thoroughly excited as a food/wine critic! cellar-aged australian wines! now, that’s going to be a FIRST! pray for me that karwei manages to buy them for me come weekend thanks kar wei!

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